The Pale King
19 Aug 2011 Leave a Comment
in Uncategorized Tags: David Foster Wallace, freedom, grad school
I’ve been reading David Foster Wallace’s posthumous novel, The Pale King, lately (which reminds me that I should probably try to return it to its rightful owner, seeing as I borrowed it without asking quite a while ago. He finished Infinite Jest in the time it’s taken me to read PK). Now is a good time to admit that, for as much as I love DFW–like adore… OK I practically worship the guy–I’m actually a little concerned that I’m becoming too indoctrinated by the practical genius of his beliefs and opinions, and lest I lose sight of who I am and what I, Lydia, apart from DFW, thinks, I need to lay him on the shelf for a while and just let my beliefs sit with his, and let life shake out what fits and what doesn’t.
I’m working on applying to graduate schools and I would love to study contemporary American literature. Or more specifically I hope to work with the concepts of grace and redemption within the context of American literature and what role those concepts play in contemporary culture. Or something like that. The idea of studying the environment as a distinct character and symbol in American literature is also extremely intriguing. The longer I spend thinking about what I want to think about, the more things there are to think about. It’s really fun, in a nerdy kind of way.
But anyway, DFW’s writings about freedom and what role it plays in American culture and how much we value it and how debilitating our concept of freedom can actually be totally, completely intrigue me and I also want to incorporate them into whatever I end up studying (we value freedom so much that the only common value in our culture is that everyone is free to think, feel and believe what they want, until what another thinks contradicts what you think, and then they’re wrong. So in fact America’s common ideology is one of hypocrisy, which is what a good friend and I concluded the other day).
I’m intrigued because the Christian tradition teaches that complete freedom is attainable through submission to God, a concept that I totally accept, despite the obvious paradox in the equation, because I believe that grace and redemption are the keys to absolute freedom. I know most people resist this idea because how could you become totally free by being less free? It’s a good question.
If I wanted to matter–even just to myself–I would have to be less free, by deciding to choose in some kind of definite way. p.224
This is getting too tangential, though. The point is, despite my possible DFW indoctrination disorder, which I’ll argue is not a terrible thing at all, I still think he’s a genius with some very True things to say. I just need to sort out what I think from what he thought and make sure my ideas are truly mine.
I do want to share some gems from The Pale King, which is the most fascinatingly boring book I’ve ever read. I hope you find these things to be true, like I do:
Sometimes what’s important is dull. Sometimes it’s work. Sometimes the important things aren’t works of art for your entertainment. p. 138
…Enduring tedium over real time in a confined space is what real courage is. p. 229
Routine, repetition, tedium, monotony, ephemeracy, inconsequence, abstraction, disorder, boredom, angst, ennui–these are the true hero’s enemies, and make no mistake, they are fearsome indeed. For they are real. p. 231
I know they aren’t super uplifting quotes, but I think that by voicing the fears and realities of boredom and repetition and tedium DFW is offering hope, and companionship, and validation. In our most alone moments, in times of angst, there is peace in the knowledge that someone else, most likely lots of someone elses, is experiencing the same fearsome sense of insignificance. So essentially in a book about the IRS and weird people who sweat a lot, Wallace has created community in the depths of solitude and despair.
